My Island and the Waves

Island 2018
“Island 2018” by jule.lumma is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

My Island and the Waves

By Jane Tawel

December 29, 2021

*

On my peaceful, happy island,

where my mindfulness is calm,

when for just a moment, I am free

of you, and me, and what has been or what might be,

I embrace all life and living,

in accord with God and all.

*

But freedom and peace even on an island, are briefly held,

while waves lap and rise and advance and swell.

But must even waves that threaten be feared,

when light is dark, and dark is light, and peace is meant for loosing?

*

What happiness I’m meant to find in watching waves,

and knowing if I see that they are only and always water,

I, too, can walk on waves.

And once my faith is practice,

then I return myself to my island,

and bring my friends along.

*

The waves are never too high when one is not alone.

And an island expands to create more time and space

 for all who trust and love.

*

©  Jane Tawel, December 29, 2021

Shall I Give You This Moment, Too?

clear hour glass with brown frame
https://unsplash.com/photos/KYxXMTpTzek

*

Shall I Give You This Moment, Too?

By Jane Tawel

December 8, 2021

*

Shall I give you this moment, too?

I gave you most of yesterday.

My fallow brain,

was trained upon,

the shallow depths and weedy ways.

*

Shall I give up the narrow Way,

of seeing teacups and seeing light;

to wallow more in thoughts most fey

and things that haunt both day and night?

Yes, haunt!– for these are spirits dim,

and not the moment I’m within.

To let the future or the past

steal yet more moments that won’t last,

is like a little death, each day,

and not True Life in The True Way.

*

It matters not if good or bad,

the things I think upon.

It’s not about you, unless you’re here.

And if you are, I’ll hold most dear,

my task to focus, until you’re gone.

But then – goodbye. We’ll both be free

until the next time you see me.

*

I seek a different Point of View.

Enough! Enough, I say!

I have anew, this gift, this day;

I’ll not waste it on you.

*

© Jane Tawel, December 2021

When We Shall See, We Shall Know

Two Paths Through the Tangled Japanese Forest
“Two Paths Through the Tangled Japanese Forest” by Trey Ratcliff is licensed under CC BY-NC-SA 2.0

*

When We See, We Shall Know

By Jane Tawel

November 14, 2021

*

When we see,

that others also see,

and even though we do things differently,

we all seek to be,

that which no matter the endeavor,

seeks to live forever,

why then,

we know in part,

somewhere deep inside our hearts,

that if we’re honest, what we really know

is all we do not know.

*

It must be true,

it must be,

for when through Time

and history,

the stories repeat and reveal,

that evil must be repealed,

and there must be something more than this,

and that all of us just want some respect,

and to believe that all people are valuable,

and that the Earth is good, so very Good,

and we are all just trying our best

to live fully and someday, perhaps to rest

in heaven, nirvana, or bliss,

because the Truth has always been there in the Myths.

When I get a glimpse,

that you believe that too,

why then I know

no matter Who we think we worship,

it must be true.

*

There are lots of jots and tittles that we focus on,

and thereby lose the locus on–

the journey’s not completed in a day.

Our compasses get skewed along the Way.

And while we age towards rebirth,

we must re-calibrate True North.

Insisting there is just one passage,

is never Love’s True Message.

*

You call it Dharma,

I call it God’s Law.

I call it Christ,

You call it All.

I take the cross,

You empty you.

Yet words are words,

but truth is Truth.

*

We see through mirrors dimly.

Our expectations lie.

When peering through this veil,

we won’t pass through, until we die,

what’s on the other side of strife

somehow, we all have faith will be new life.

*

So, what I call my point of view,

can have a different name than you

call yours. We all have precious worth

in this great journey to rebirth.

*

Today I finally stopped to hear,

and put away my childish fears

and sat awhile and did my lessons

in others’ sages, books, and heavens.

And when I stopped my fear’s critiquing,

I found in All, we all are seeking,

the same great hope, a faith, The Way,

to make tomorrow, better than today.

*

No one’s belief is ever perfect,

but if my choice has this effect:

that Love is growing day by day,

then I am walking in The Way.

*

No matter what we think we know,

the only way to truly see,

Heaven, The Light, The Christ, The Path,

is not by doing simple math

of you’re wrong here, and I’m right there,

but losing hatreds born of fear,

and living lives of grace and care.

*

And as we stride this petty pace,

and rush from holy place to place,

we sometimes need to simply– Stop.

*

and Breathe.

*

The Truth is not, as yet, reality,

at least on that we all agree.

Yet, if I seek, I’ll surely find

That every heart, and soul, and mind,

is longing, hoping, always yearning,

for that Great Love beyond our learning.

*

What I don’t know,

I’ll someday see,

was always there, right in front of me,

and All our Love will live eternally.

*

Breathe, on me, Breath of God,

Breathe through me, in me,

Breath of Life.

And when all breath is gone,

may my true being be One with Love.

*

You don’t know now.

I can’t see all.

But One Day, hand in hand, we shall,

be free

and see.

And I will know your true name,

and you shall know mine.

*

© Jane Tawel, November 2021

Not Knowing Left from Right

person holding black round container
https://unsplash.com/photos/2mg-3crJFgk

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Not Knowing Left from Right

By Jane Tawel

October 20, 2021

*

I am directionally challenged,

not knowing left from right,

which has worked to my advantage,

in silly political fights.

*

And if you ask me up? or down?

My head will spin quite right around,

for even heaven and hell, my dear.

are not out there but present with us here, I fear.

We don’t have that much far to go,

to peer inside to what we know,

and lose the bad, to find the good,

within us is Eternal Flow.

*

The truth is?—Life is seek and sway.

So, walk in circles to walk The Way.

By finding what you think’s outside,

You’ll find you have The Way inside.

*

Yes, to The God, direction-less,

I hope that I can do my best,

and not know what is out or in,

or on my right, or on my left,

or left behind, or up ahead,

or down below, or up above,

but that I will get lost and tossed,

and topsy-turvy in True North’s Love.

*

© Jane Tawel October 20, 2021

A Lack Recognized May Lead to Why

forest trees marked with question marks
https://unsplash.com/photos/i–IN3cvEjg

A Lack Recognized May Lead to Why

By Jane Tawel

October 19, 2021

*

A lack of contentment often leads us,

when really, it should follow.

It takes us out of acceptance and peace,

and into pursuits most hollow.

*

With no sense of acquiring completion,

We look not inwards but out,

to therapy, religion, addiction,

or buying or trading in love’s parody.

Without Presence and cohesion

We are lured by the sirens of repletion.

*

We wake, immediately dissatisfied,

and search within books or tasks,

and we think we are looking for answers,

but all we’re left with are questions we ask, ask, ask.

It’s the Why, and the Why, and the Why that we lack.

It’s “The Reason” we keep looking for.

It’s the focus on what we once had once before,

It’s the looking beyond for a new exit door,

It’s the upping our game in the need to outscore,

And we buy and we buy so we don’t feel so poor,

and we’re always left lonely and searching for more.

*

And you surely can hear in rhymes’ reiteration,

the mode we live in is vast acceleration.

So, to leave us all with just one bit of advice,

Let the worries and joys of today all suffice.

For yesterday can be the gift that you seek,

if you let your heart’s memories be lovingly tweaked,

and keep only the good and the healthful remembrance,

for the rest is a burden and ill-causing encumbrance.

And Tomorrow – why that is the gift we don’t have yet.

So why think what might happen?–that’s just a fool’s bad bet.

If we know that by waking tomorrow we win,

then to anticipate sorrow is truly a sin.

*

So Rejoice! You have Choice!

Choose today to embrace–

just your time, just your self, just your life in this place!

And no matter how bad your life truly is seeming,

You’re important – remember, your life has a meaning.

You’re created by special intent and design.

You are loved. You are God’s child. You are truly divine.

So today, treat yourself as if you’re more than matter,

Because Someone believes that you really do “matter”.

You are You. We are We. They are They. I am I.

And that’s it. That is all. That alone, answers, “Why”.

*

© Jane Tawel October 19, 2021

For One I Loved and Lost

My Mom, Jane Gordon Cook, March 31, 1934 – July 7, 2021

*

On July 7, 2021, my greatest cheerleader, most enduring audience, loving critic, incomparable supporter, and most beloved mother, Jane Cook, passed away from this life.  Life will never be the same. Writing will never be the same.  The following are some pathetic attempts at thoughts on her passing, in the knowledge that words can never express what we feel with great loss and great love.  As I wrote the following, I thought of others I loved who have passed and those I love now and foolishly hope will never die. Friends –Seize the Day and let those you love, know it – right now.  Jane

*

#1 Your Love Is Still Here

*

A lot of people died today,

but only one was mine.

A lot of people passed away.

I wonder, which were Thine?

*

I know not what is at Life’s End.

A lot of people can pretend,

that Death is simply Heaven’s Bend;

but no one truly comprehends.

All that I know?– You were my friend.

*

And I shall strive to live the part,

Your love created in my heart.

And I will trust, through all my tears,

that your Love still is here.

*

#2 I Only Know Now

*

And do not say to me, “It will…”

I only know what is no longer now.

And do not tell me “It will get better…”

Today I can only live in this moment,

 that this bleak Finality “is”.

*

My eschatology veered sharply from yours,

the moment that my Some\body died.

The End Times are upon me

and I will live with ashes on my soul

in a world that cannot bear the sight of

the ashes I long to wear on my head.

If only the world could see the black armband

constricting the muscles around my heart.

*

Some\body died today; Some\body who cared for

and was cared for by me;

that first and ultimate person,

who made the “I”, in “me”, a “We”;

that “We” is now forever and ever lost.

And like a limb lopped off of my being,

the ghost of remembrance of what used to be,

gives me no joy.

Encouragements of what I might be able to do someday

without my lost limb,

give me no comfort.

Loss is all. Loss is now.

*

You long to leap straight and with daring ease,

back to the past of memories,

or to the future, which you believe,

is free of sorrow and heavenly.

Be free in knowing,

I do not begrudge you, your need or your worldview.

But please do not offer it to me.

It is a poor substitution for my grief.

*

Death for me, has brought endless ending,

and Now, is only dross.

And in my loss,

the emptiness and lack of meaning,

is all I can hold on to.

I cannot see the shore, until I have drowned,

and all I can cling to

is what made me feel safe,

and gave Love its meaning

for me, for us.

*

I have lost the one voice that’s been inside,

my head, my heart, for all these years.

Please keep your platitudes and thoughts you mean to cheer me.

I will, however, grateful be, if you would silently,

endure with me my tears.

*

Time has finally condensed the story,

constricting like a deadly boa,

to Only Now.

The Now is the ache of the battering ram of emotions,

the unbidden memories that spell “no more”,

the gaping holes in my heart,

the “what ifs” and “shoulds” and “could haves, should haves, would haves”

… if only.

*

Oh yes, with time, wounds stop seeping,

and may, in time, become scars.

Yes, duties and needs will stop my weeping,

but for now, my strength is bleeding out.

And in these lost and mournful hours,

 I can only know Now, in my heart.

For the You that was mine, and the life that was “ours”,

for me, in life-left, left me ever alone,

from the moment for me, we were finally apart.

*

Going forward tomorrow I do not know how,

and your memories are slicing me through.

For today, it is true I may only know Now,

Yet one thing I do know — you loved me,

and Oh! How I loved you.

*

I will always miss you Mom, and I wish I could tell you that again. I will always love you, Mom and I wish that I had told you that more. 

Jane,  July 18, 2021

Dreams On the Journey

by Jane Tawel

empty road surrounded with trees with fog
https://unsplash.com/photos/5FHv5nS7yGg

Dreams on the Journey

By Jane Tawel

July 6, 2021

*

Dreams often start skidding a bit,

when reality appears in the road.

And if we are carrying a load,

of a vision that won’t clear up,

smooth and pristine,

but rather gleans from us,

the weight of our meaning,

this gleaning,

is to be

and to see

what lies inert in the road –

well, that is the load we bear.

And yet, we compare

ourselves to the myth of ourselves

not sitting on shelves

but growing and changing,

ever rearranging into someone

that is the myth of our true wholeness.

So now, we can go with boldness,

into the might and right

and the true light from True Light,

ever loving and being loved.

Hither and yon,

to the hopeful beyond,

and all the parts of you and I

Become whole.

The goals of every holy scroll

keep rolling us on and on

Because that is who and what and

Why.

Our dreams become the answer

to the real Why.

And the road is never clearer

but only dearer.

And the task is never fearless,

but only nearer.

And we walk on,

dreaming despite the bumps in the road,

or the mist.

Because though we may miss the gist

We will bear witness.

And in the midst

We will resist the need to just exist.

But instead we will yearn to grow,

Becoming One with the journey’s flow.

© Jane Tawel 2021

Before the Dawn

by Jane Tawel

black and white tree branch with moon
https://unsplash.com/photos/ZB2S8hO2xFw

Before the Dawn

By Jane Tawel

July 1, 2021

*

Can you see in the dark?

Even just a small spark?

Do you look? Do you listen?

For through the dark glistens

a hint of the Light

that will conquer the Night

and will make all things right.

For the lost and the blind,

at Dawn’s dawning will find

that in every night time

our dreams of The Sublime

were realities waiting to shine.

*

Wake up early and hear;

and before the Dawn peer

into what seems from us hidden,

but to which we are bidden

to be still and to know–

God is here.

© Jane Tawel 2021

Will We Rise?

by Jane Tawel

What does phoenix rising from the ashes mean – Embrace yourself, embrace  the world

Laura – pixels.com

Will We Rise?

By Jane Tawel

June 18, 2021

*

Will we find enough band-aides today,

to staunch flows of our enemies’ blood?

Will we march enough steps today,

to dam prejudicial floods?

And when tomorrow our children ask

if we raised our hands to the holy task

of reviving the World’s needy honor,

and repairing our own little corner

of broken parts and hurting hearts,

will we lie in the ashes

of our own set fires?

Or rise like a phoenix from grace-infused pyres?

*

Will my mind today shut-down from its reeling

at the Earth’s burning? I’m fearfully feeling

we’ll all die from our greed

and the unanswered need

of a world that craves desperate healing.

*

Create in me a new heart.

One that beats to the Earth’s Special Song.

Today I will do my own part

to be Love, to be One, to Belong.

Amen and amen, let us say once again,

We did once, and we will!

We did once, and we will!

We did then;

we will do it again!

*

Will we make enough headway tomorrow

to end Our World’s war-weary sorrow?

Will we have had enough

of the proud and the tough?

And instead choose the meek

and all follow, like sheep,

The Good Shepherd, Who loves us so much?

*

Time ticks and it tocks

and even the rocks

now cry out — “Hosanna!

Please, Save us!” Each man and

each woman and child;

every beast, tame or wild,

are looking ahead,

to the “Anti-Love Dread”

of the end of All Life as we know it.

(We certainly seem to have blown it.)

But we’ll fight! — Some will fight!

Young and old, we just might,

win the day over night

and a New World Reborn —  we will grow it.

*

We vow today to stand together.

We take today this solemn pledge:

We will fight war with Peace.

We will fight lies with Truth.

We will kill greed with sharing,

and meet needs by our caring.

We will change hate with love.

We will rise, young and old

One day our tale will be told,

How the World almost died,

But Love made it Arise!

We shall rise!

We shall rise!

*

Earth will rise,

like a Phoenix, She’ll Rise!

We shall rise like a Savior,

we’ll rise!

And Our God will arise.

Like a Cooled Sun, He’ll Rise!

Like a Bright Star, She’ll Rise!

And All Goodness shall Rise,

They shall rise!

They shall rise!

They shall rise!

*

Like a New Day that Dawns,

Love Shall Rise!

With sacrificial protection,

We shall become Resurrection.

Will we start today?

Will we find The Way?

Will we Rise Up?

Will we Rise Up?

Will we Rise?

God! I pray, we will rise…

(c) Jane Tawel 2021

A Prayer for Hole-ness

brown rock formation during daytime
https://unsplash.com/photos/AWoVDcSYgak

A Prayer for Hole-ness

By Jane Tawel

May 25, 2021

*

I often pray for whole-ness,

but just today I thought,

that I should pray for hole-ness,

to become what I ought.

Wholeness can often mean control,

but emptying should be my goal,

not only just to make me whole,

but to embrace the empty spaces,

and broken lives, and lonely faces,

of brothers, sisters, enemies–

through empathy come remedies.

For when I leave a legacy,

There won’t be much left of my soul,

Unless I leave a hole.

© Jane Tawel 2021