A Pick-Me-Up for The Present Time
By Jane Tawel
IMPORTANT NOTE: My poem below and this post are not meant any way to make light of people with ongoing depression. It also is not at all meant to imply that people with depression or who are sad, should not seek help professionally, personally, from the experts, and from friends and family who love you. This poem is merely an attempt on my part to address my own dealings with loss and sadness at the current time as I am having to deal with certain issues.
Perhaps because you are more isolated and alone, you too, need just a small reminder to look on the bright side of your life as soon as you are possibly able. Perhaps you are feeling more vulnerable in yourself, or your relationships, or your beliefs. When the world seems dark, keep looking for the light. And if you can’t find the light yourself, follow the person with the flashlight or the candle. Believe in your heroic ability to do what you need to do in such a time as this. And if you can’t believe in your own abilities, lean hard on and use without guilt, the gifts and guidance of those people who have suffered much and still managed to have big hearts and a lot of love for other people.
I often have felt, at least in my own culture, we lack the ability to truly grieve and truly angst. We do need to go completely through the process of completely grieving or mourning the loss of something or someone, and that takes time, which we are seldom given enough of to do it all properly. If you are feeling down today for big or small reasons, or even for reasons that you can’t even put your finger on to explain what and why they are – let yourself feel sad. Let yourself feel down. This too is part of the journey that leads to something and somewhere and sometimes Someone or someone. We can’t always succumb to fear of sadness in the same we can not always succumb to fear of viruses. Neither one is something we want, but neither will any of us remain unchanged by the reality of both in the human experience. Change can be good, even when painful. But as one of my favorite quotes, says, fear can be a super-power if you use it the right way. And so can sadness and even a manageable amount of depression.
I am not recommending that you fast-forward to denial and I am not recommending that you skip ahead to self-medicate yourself with a false sense of happiness. It is not wrong to grieve or feel scared, or even to feel depressed, if you go through these things with the idea that it is for a greater purpose than wallowing in them. And if you make quite certain that you know somewhere inside your deepest self, that you are never meant to stay there in any of those things – not fear, not sorrow, and not depression. You are meant to go on to that feeling that makes you know you are bigger than anything small enough to live inside you – virus or fear or depression. You are meant to believe that hope and all of those actions and that particular life that only you and you alone – that all of that can come out of suffering to be something better.
Believe that there are big good things waiting for you, and that those things are strong enough and plentiful enough to defeat the small bad things — big things like smiles and laughter, and kindness and trust, warm food and warm touches, and lovely smells and lovely sights, and sweet dreams and sweet words, and of course, there will be the biggest most powerful weapon against all the bad stuff, the greatest of all — Love.
We may have to wait, and we may not like waiting, but perhaps we should remember that it is better to be out here pacing in the waiting room, than in the metaphoric surgery or morgue. Waiting means there is time to learn and learning means there is hope, even perhaps, in life after the surgery or morgue. So if you are feeling helpless, imagine instead that there is something, someone that needs your love. And love is worth waiting for.
You are the piece of coal today, that tomorrow can be a diamond. You are cocooning today, so that tomorrow you can be the butterfly. You are feeling the gritty sand behind your tired, sick, sorrowful eyes right now, so that tomorrow your eyes can be clear, and you will become as transparently real and as beautiful as glass. Today’s grinding sand are tomorrow’s windows to a cleaner, brighter soul.
The more sand has escaped from the hourglass of our life, the clearer we should see through it. Jean Paul
Grieve and moan, angst and hide out for a bit, but take care of yourself. Let yourself hope even if you can’t feel it yet. Let yourself love something, even if it is something small or inanimate, even if it can’t love you back. I have been loving the actors on old Netflix TV series who make me laugh, even though they will never love me back. I have been loving the sound of the birds outside my window, the smell of cinnamon raisin toast and coffee, and the dredged-up memories of wonderful times I have shared with people I love.
Let yourself own your feelings for now, but realize you have only checked out those feelings for the time being. Like a book from the library that you don’t enjoy, return it as fast as possible and find another reading on life that can make you smile and feel hopeful again. Seek and find the very best parts of YOU, and of others, and seek some modicum of joy wherever and whenever you can, in those people and things around you.
*******At the end of this post, as in some of my past posts, I will share several links that you can text or call if your depression has reached such lows that you do not want to live any more. Please skip ahead to those links if you are feeling that way right now.
Please know that you are an important part of the lives that surround you and even if you don’t feel it right now, there is help and there is a way out of this and a way forward. Don’t give up.
A Poetic Pick-Me-Up
By Jane Tawel
March 17, 2020
*
I can’t stay sad for long,
It isn’t in my nature.
Unless I have done wrong,
To creature or Creator,
I’ll find the brightest side,
And let that be my guide,
To muddle on,
A smile to don,
And not stay down for long.
*
If I’m not in the right,
I’ll muster all my might,
To ask to be forgiven,
And then get back to livin’.
So, if I have hurt you,
Then please, just tell me true,
And also what to do,
To change your point of view.
*
But if I’m blue because,
The universe seems flawed,
And I am sad inside,
I’ll let Love be my guide.
I’ll cry or rant or rave,
But soon, I will be brave,
Enough to see the glass
More full– and greener grass.
Because when all is over,
I’d rather be in clover,
Than sitting on my bum,
And feeling mad or glum.
*
For a little while I gave up,
And then my mind, I made up,
To find the strength to burrow,
My way towards tomorrow.
There’s light and love just round the bend,
So, I will let my sore heart mend,
And find some joy in living
And then get back to giving,
Myself the right to heal awhile,
And find some peace, and find a smile.
*
I hope that if you’re weary,
And like I, maybe teary,
That you won’t give up either.
Just give yourself a breather,
From worrying or angst-ing,
Or in sor-row ensconcing.
I’m here for you, and you for me.
And surely, we can both agree,
That if we really need each other,
Our grief and woes, they will not smother,
The best in you and best in me,
And that is what humanity,
Can do, and live, and hope, and be.
*
With just a little happiness,
And trying to look on the best,
I think we’ll overcome the rest
Of what has made us feel depressed.
And letting go our pains and woes,
And seeing how this next bit goes,
We might to joy and peace succumb,
And our depressions overcome.
*
So, I will hope, but I won’t rush it,
And even when life’s lost its luster,
I’ll trust and love and faith I’ll muster
For if I shine just one more smile,
Then I’ll feel happier in a while.
Yes, happiness can be a plan,
To counteract and to demand,
That I care for my heart and soul,
And make some joy my greater goal.
Yes, I can cry and I can grieve,
But I am meant for joie de vivre.
*
Tomorrow I may mourn again,
And feel more sorrow and more pain,
But now, I’ll store fear on a shelf,
And take good care of my wee self.
I’ll find a smile, and do my part,
To heal my mind, soul, bones, and heart.
*
For life is good and love is long,
and hope can never do us wrong.
For fear is small and passing’s strife,
So, grasp at love, and re-love life.
*
Don’t ever be afraid or ashamed to get help with serious feelings of sadness or depression. The links below are to services that are available 24/7. Your call or text will be anonymous, and free.
Be brave enough to think you matter enough to someone to find hope in your journey. You are worthy of another day here with us. Believe it.
YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BELIEVE YOU ARE SUICIDAL TO CALL OR TEXT THESE NUMBERS. YOU JUST NEED TO KNOW YOU WOULD LIKE SOME HELP WITH LIVING TODAY.
PLEASE SHARE THIS WITH ANYONE YOU THINK COULD USE A HELPING HAND TODAY ALONG WITH YOUR OWN.
https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ CALL 1-800-273-8255
You can also text the Crisis Text Line:
USA: Text HOME to 741741
UK: Text 85258
CANADA: Text 686868
Or
24/7 Crisis Hotline: National Suicide Prevention Lifeline Network
http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/
1-800-273-TALK (8255) (Veterans, press 1)
Crisis Text Line
Text TALK to 741-741 to text with a trained crisis counselor from the Crisis Text Line for free, 24/7
Jane Tawel 